Yesterday I bought a season pass to swim and do water aerobics at this pool just down the street from us. This morning I drag my butt out of bed at six am to go to my first water aerobics class. Keep in mind that I am looking like Medusa with the intent of jumping into the water the first possible moment and hoping no one notices my bed head in the mean time. I'm just not into mornings anyway and certainly not enough to wake up ten minutes EARLIER to fix my hair before getting into a pool. So I get there, notice three cars in the parking lot (all of which have a city logo), bars on the pool gates and a pool cover securely in place. Not good signs. But don't worry--I immedialty run into a city maintenance worker in desperate need of suspenders who acts like he’s never heard of a water aerobics class before and is suspicious of me possibly having a crack pipe habit. Mostly becasue he keeps staring at my hair.

I’m gonna have to go look at that brochure again. Crap.

Oregon

We went to the Oregon Coast for a week last week. Yeah, it was March. Yeah, we are morons. We were hoping to get some sun, but mostly that was only going to happen if the rays could penetrate through the eight layers of clothing we had to wear to keep our blood from freezing. But I got to see the ocean again and Shawn got to eat fish so we were happy. And Sydney? She mostly just wanted to play on the swings. Good thing we traveled 800 miles so she could play on the swings. They are way better than the ones down the block.

OK, I just got this email from my sister Heather in Montana and I HAD to share: “So when a cow is at your window watching you type, is that a peeping tom or a redneck?”

That was followed by THIS picture of her front door:



What a pervert!

Martha Stewart in a Can

I am breaking my strict "once every three months" posting rule--but at least this one has pictures. After being extremely proud of our Martha Stewart moment (nevermind that this is the "anyone can do it idiot version" gingerbread kit found at costco) I found the camera and tried to use it for the first time in forever (I’m not good at being a girl. I don’t ever think to take the camera, and when I do, I don’t think to use it. And when I make it that far the battery is usually dead. Or the memory is full. I’ll work on it.) So in the mean time, enjoy the phone pictures of our project last night. Sydney did this all by herself. She is a genius. And she can count to ten.

Photography Business

For the past few months between my work and Shawn’s school and work our little family is all in the same room for about 15 minutes a day (Shawn: if you are reading this I am pretty sure I forgot to push the water pitcher thing all the way back into the fridge so there is a real good chance the floor will be flooded again when you get home. Sorry. And your Mom called. She’s good.) So in lieu of family pictures, Sydney and I took a few self portraits with my cell phone. I think I am really getting the hang of this photography thing. You can almost see both of our heads in that last one. And it’s close to centered. I’m thinking about starting up a business. Maybe a glamour-shots booth in the mall if things really take off. But call early if you want your picture taken. I have a feeling that I may be booked real fast after everyone gets a look at my superior skillz...

The Zoo

So we took Sydney to the Zoo on Saturday. Lucky for us it was teddy bear Saturday and you got 2 bucks off if you showed your teddy bear at the door. I was so glad our hours of digging through her toys for a stuffed animal really paid off since we got to the gate and the stuffed animal was still in the car. Not that the 8 acre walk back to the car in 110 degree weather wasn’t worth the savings, but technically all we had to show for our hours of searching was a stuffed puppy anyway. We paid the 2 bucks.

Once we got inside the zoo Sydney was more interested in the rocks and the water than in any of the animals. Maybe because between the dog and the bird and Shawn’s 22 year-old brother we have lived in the equivalent of a zoo at the in-laws for the past year. She is used to it. But when we tried to drag her away from the rock she was fascinated by and come look at the rare albino alligator she was not a happy girl. Same thing when she had to be drug away from the penguins because we wouldn’t let her go "schwibbing" in their pool.

The Carousel was much better—she thought she was begin tortured by the ostrich she was riding and screamed the whole way around—all 54 times. Since when are Carousel rides that long! The crowd we passed on each lap was growing as they watched the screeching child cling to life lap after lap without ever giving up on the earsplitting howl. After the tenth trip around with Sydney’s lungs holding out perfectly the spectators began to give us the "ohh, too bad your kid doesn’t know how to have fun” look. One lady even came up and offered her a gummy bear as we got off the ride because “she had been so brave.” Great. Now Sydney equates the carousel with a trip to the dentist. Tickets to the Zoo: $16.00. A ride on the carousel $4.00. Creating lasting aversions to family outings by the time she turns three: priceless.

Maybe next year.

Hey!

I’m blogging! I blog. I am a blogger. Ahoy! (Can you picture me screaming this while strapped to the mast with a life jacket on? Yeah, me too.) Not sure what I am doing. Not sure how to do it. Maybe that is because I thought I was morally opposed to blogging (not other people blogging – me blogging) so I have tried my best to feign ignorance to this point. But I have caved. What's next - Papa Murphy's pizza? (Something I am also vehemently opposed to - if I wanted to cook my own pizza I would have stayed home.) Hopefully this will end here - no more exceptions to my principles. In fact, if I start to use the words "moist" or "ointment" in context would someone please step in and take charge? Until then, here goes nothing...